I have never felt beautiful. I don’t wallow in self pity or anything but I have always regarded other women as prettier than me. I, like so many women, focus on my blemishes and jiggly spots. It’s hard to see my good traits and it’s hard to look at myself without a critical eye. I can rattle off my good character traits, but physical beauty eludes me. I always feel like something is not quite right. The world might see me as confident, but truth be told, I am not. And look, I’m not fishing for compliments here. I imagine the most beautiful of women share my insecurities.
I am no-nonsense and passionate and loud-mouthed. Being loud does not equal being confident. Quite the contrary, in fact. I have strong opinions and passions and stand behind my voice, even when discouraged or attempted to be gagged by others. I believe in the power of words and wish more people bravely used theirs. I know my words have made a difference. I’m proud of that. But still, I lack confidence and let vanity chip away at my psyche.
When I look in the mirror I see a face that is not particularly pretty or glamorous, but nice. I find my face to be perfectly acceptable and I do think I have some great eyelashes. The ladies at the brow salon always compliment my brows, though they do start chattering away in Vietnamese and mention something about a lip wax and chortle amongst themselves. The one thing that has bothered me for my whole life are my…teeth.
They are crooked and crammed and slightly vampire-esque on top. There’s no Lauren Hutton dental signature going on. No agency is going to sign me (never mind that I am five feet tall). My teeth have always given me pause. I finally got the gumption to see someone about straightening me out. I was opting for Invisalign, eschewing a metal mouth at age 43. The whole rigamarole of straightening my teeth would involve having three impacted wisdom teeth pulled. This is not a cake walk at my age, and the bikini diet plan isn’t worth it. Besides, I would likely eat ice cream through the whole recovery and actually gain weight. Recovery time would eat into summer vacation, and the hassles of Mac Daddy running the show single-handedly while working full-time wouldn’t be a tin can of marbles if you know what I mean.
And then there’s the expense.
Do we really need to spend THOUSANDS of dollars just to give me straight teeth? My return on investment is pretty slim. I really should have done this in my teen years or my twenties. I’m starting to waver on the whole straight teeth thing. I’m not scared. I can handle pain. I had bunion surgery, which is infinitely worse than childbirth. Seriously. Think what I can do with all that money… A vacation for my family or a vacation for the dentists? Hmmm…
Recovery and money aside, this is elective surgery I’m talking about (I’d be put under to have all three wisdom teeth removed at once.). Is my vanity worth all this? Admittedly, this ordeal isn’t about self esteem or confidence; it’s about vanity. I admit it. The price of vanity is already too high among women, and it has taken its toll.
For what it’s worth, I just finished invisalign last week and I am so glad I did it. Wore braces in elem school but not my retainer so they didn’t stay straight. I realize you have the surgery to deal with first (I had all 4 wisdom teeth cut out in high school because of overcrowding, so I know that’s not fun), but I can tell you that invisalign is annoying but not painful and totally worth the expense.
I have debating Invisalign for almost a year and I’m in the same boat. Everyone tells me that my teeth are fine, but I can’t get over the space in between my teeth. If you end up going for it and your orthodontist is good, I hope you’ll write about him here so I can check him/her out if I take the plunge.
Good luck!
Go for it! Your vanity is worth it! John is about to do Invisalign at 65! And ask your dentist if there are dental benefits too. It was recommended for John because of dental benefits not cosmetic. You may benefit in your 60’s from having done this in your 40’s.
Good luck and keep us posted.
Hello, I am wearing Invasalign now, similar to Cyndi, I had metal braces in elem school but didn’t wear my retainer. I don’t have wisdom teeth so I never had them extracted and don’t know what that pain/expense is like. For me, I am glad I did Invaslign. More because my teeth were so hard to floss on the bottom because they had shifted and I was losing gum tissue. So now that my teach are straightening, there are actually little gaps in my teeth where i’ve lost gum tissue in between. It is annoying to remember to put them in after eating but they are convenient in caring for them. Good luck with your decision and I think you are lovely in that picture!
My mom has to have or or two of her wisdom teeth removed. She’s in her 70s and they just started to cause problems. Who’s to say that wouldn’t happen to you? I don’t recall recovery from wisdom teeth being more than a few days of pain and maybe a week or two of adjustment.
As far as Invisalign? Go for it!
P.S. I always think of you as having beautiful olive skin and generally being very pretty and put together.
Oh, please no! I don’t think you should change a thing about your teeth! I know you said you aren’t fishing for compliments (and I believe you) but when you were at our house the other day, I was seriously thinking “Wow, she is SO beautiful!” I was intimidated in a way by how beautiful you are. And while I have not focused on your teeth necessarily, I think they add character and are cute; who wants plain vanilla generic perfectionism anyway?
Did you decide to move forward with Invisalign? I just scheduled my consultation for July 27 to see if it’d be a good fit for me.
I came across your site randomly and I think you are a very beautiful lady in a very exotic way. Change whatever you wan about yourself if it makes you fel better even if nobody else notices. Even the most logical intelligent person has some degree of vanity and insecurities (even if they dont admit to it). But know that you are lovely as you are.